The first thing any self-defense instructor will tell you is that the fight is always won in your head…before the physical confrontation even begins.

What is meant by this is that if you don’t have the correct attitude, knowledge, and confidence, you will lose more often than you’ll win.

This is true of any aspect of life, not just self-defense. However, the point is really brought home when it’s you versus the bad guy who wants to hurt you. Think about it this way: the person attacking you wouldn’t be doing so if that person didn’t believe that he stands a good chance of overcoming you. You don’t purposefully get into situations where you’re sure to lose and, likely, neither does he.

Somehow, your attacker must know he’s got the upper hand. Why?

Your body language is your subliminal indicator of your overall attitude and confidence level. Most people instinctively tune into others’ body language and know the general attitude and intentions of the person they’re looking at. This is why you get “gut feelings” about people when you first see or meet them. An attacker will tune into this just like anyone else. If he senses weakness, he’ll take advantage.

This doesn’t mean you should be defensive and mean all of the time. It just means you should feel confident about yourself and give a bearing of self-assuredness. The less confident you are, the more often you project fear and the more likely you are to be a victim.

If a confrontation does occur, you should have an attitude of security in your confidence. You get this through preparedness and training. When the attack comes, if you automatically know what to do and how to react, you’ll be confident in your movements and reactions. This will help to change the upper-hand to your favor. Most attackers, when confronted with a prepared and trained reaction will immediately acknowledge defeat and strive to get away from the situation.

Preparedness and training aren’t that difficult to achieve. Once you have them, you will gain confidence and therefore own the three ingredients necessary to successfully avoid and deter aggressive attacks.

For example, a woman friend of mine carries a kubotan and pepper spray with her at all times, especially when she goes out jogging. Part of her warm up routine before going out to run is to make punches and gouges with the kubotan as she brings her heart rate up. She then begins to stretch to loosen her muscles for the run. During this stretching, she makes movements of “presentation” with her pepper spray bottle. These little things, done each day she goes out jogging, prepare her for an encounter that could mean life-or-death for her. Yet her practice of them takes up no more time than her already-scheduled workout.

This practice gives her confidence in herself, which in turn means she gives off the wrong body language signals to potential attackers and is probably decreasing her chances of being a victim.

To ignore your own security and safety is to beat yourself senseless and hand the win over to your attacker before the attack has even begun. Ignoring your own safety is like hanging a sign around your neck begging to become a victim.

Don’t beat yourself senseless before you’ve even started. Learn to defend yourself and your loved ones and gain the confidence and knowledge you need to avoid the confrontation with an attacker or criminal before it ever happens.

by Aaron Turpen of http://www.awwSecurity.com
Aaron is the proprietor of AWWSecurity.com, which sells realistic self-defense and security products for the real world. Visit http://www.awwSecurity.com and learn how you can protect yourself and your loved ones today.